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Why we criticise others

Why do we vehemently criticise other people about their imperfections? We do know that every human has weaknesses and that each of us is simply struggling through life without crashing under the weight of societal expectation.

And yet even with this knowledge, we still engage in the debilitating actions of making enemies by pointing out the mistakes of others. As humans, we judge ourselves harshly. We do not, as the saying goes, cut ourselves some slack. But the burden is made heavier by our brothers and sisters who criticise and put us down.

But why do we find fault with other people? Well, for starters, it is because the faults we see in others serve as a mirror to our own faults. Yes, the reason it irritates you when someone picks their nose in public is because you do it yourself. And since you already know this about yourself, it subconsciously reminds you of something you do not approve in yourself.

Image courtesy of memegenerator.net


The second reason, I believe is even more interesting. We pick others apart, for instance, that friend who loudly belches after a meal, because it serves as a mirror to something you would like the freedom to do. Just like children sometimes irritate us with their nagging, because they don't understand that in the "grown-up" world, once you ask for something, you wait until it's given. But no, children do not care about our feelings; they will cry and throw tantrums until they get what they want. And in this sense, we want permission to be able to do this.

However, due to the fact that we have grown up, we cannot behave in this manner. The moment we see others behaving like this, it reminds us of the freedom we don't have and it hurts, badly. Instead of looking for a way to express ourselves, we use the easiest weapon at our disposal, a sharp tongue.

What can we do? Remind ourselves that we are human and fully accept our faults, so that it does not hurt when we look at others. We should also give ourselves the freedom to be like children, so that the freedoms of others do not threaten us.

And that is my 2-ndururu worth of opinion...

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