Chair: Order! Let's have some order in here! (looking around) Do we have all the parties in here? (his assistant looks around, counts the faces, and nods). Alright, let's get on with it, what are the matters at hand?
(A hand at the far edge of the room shoots up, it's a young man who has been quiet all along)
Young man: Mr. Chairman sir, may I...
Chair: Please tell us your name, where you come from and why it is you have called for this meeting.
Young man: Thank you sir. My name is Ezekiel, and I am a resident of this town. I would like to express my interest in buying a car from your dealership.
Chair: (leaning back in his chair) Ok, go on...
Ezekiel: I have seen a certain model of a car being driven in town and I'm considering buying it from your dealership. However, I am not certain it is the right car for me...
Chair: Why not?
Ezekiel: Well, for one, I do not know how it drives. I have spoken to three different drivers, and they give contradicting information. Further, I don't know what happens if I buy it and do not like it, can I return it?
Chair: Whoa! One point at a time. (A hand shoots up at the other end of the table) Ok, Grace, would you like to take the first question? (The one named Grace nods) Ok, please respond...
Grace: Thank you chair. (Facing Ezekiel) My name is Grace, and I specialize in helping people find the right car. This car model, can you point out from posters on the wall? (Ezekiel points to the poster of a silver car on the opposite wall) Good choice Ezekiel! But is it good for you? To know this, you need to book a test drive round our track which helps you get comfortable with having the car, exploring the features and seeing how it drives. A car may look good from the outside, but once you drive it, it might not be a good choice for you. We always recommend a test drive...
Ezekiel: Can I drive it on a normal road under normal circumstances? In all honesty, a test track is never good enough for real-world scenarios.
Grace: Excellent question! Yes you can; however, that arrangement has some more stringent rules, and you need to sign a lot of papers, and pay some money first. Suffice it to say, we do not want a freeloader.(sits down as Ezekiel nods his understanding)
Chair: Thank you Grace. Who will tackle the next question? Yes Martin...
Martin: Thank you Chair. (turning to Ezekiel) Our return policy is elaborate; we discourage returns because it looks bad on our books and shows that there was no proper advice during the buying process, or it was not heeded. Further, the returned car usually has some dents, and it requires us to do some work to get it in the right shape for resale. Even then, its face value may have dropped, and other people are less likely to notice it and ask for it. In short, we highly discourage returns. We would rather you spend a lot of time test-driving the cars and finding the right match, than rush and have to return one. It's painful to you, to us and the car.
Ezekiel: What if I have two cars I cannot choose between?
Chair: Then choose either (a roar of laughter erupts from the table) Seriously though, I have found that deep down, there's the car we really want even though the test drive results show that it is far too tiny for us, or its engine is far too big for our liking. Sometimes people have bought cars with the hope of modifying them, but that's a great folly. Two years later, they will have wasted money, time and energy, and the result will be ugly, and something they cannot even drive. And then there's the car that's perfect for us, if we would overlook the mundane details, such as its color, or the sunroof and so on. Learn to look out for the core attributes and leave those simple characteristics out. Also, remember that you cannot drive two cars at the same time. Whichever you choose, give it the serious test driving it deserves and judge it on its own merits
Ezekiel: (nodding) I see. (turning to his adviser and whispering for a moment) What happens once I identify the car, and would like to purchase it.
Chair: Aaaaah! We make some money from you. (another laughter, this time more sustained and jovial; even Ezekiel is laughing) Our sales and legal team will meet with you to arrange the payment plan, sign papers and issue you the keys. Of course, you must have insurance, a valid driving licence and some experience handling cars.
Ezekiel: Why so elaborate?
Chair: It helps us weed out the suckers and the not-so-serious buyers. A car is an important buy; done right, you only need do it once; done wrong, it will wreck your life; we prefer the former. Any other concerns, questions or observations?
Ezekiel: None that come to mind, for now. Well, how soon can I start my test drive?
Chair: As soon as you can convince yourself of the car you want to test drive. Remember to take this seriously; talk to other people, think about it, pray about it. And then let's have some fun!
(Turning to the group)
There being no other matters, I'd like to adjourn this meeting.
(Everyone rises and leaves talking excitedly about this prospect customer; he will pas to legend as one who had no clue about how to buy a car)
PS: the car-selling round-table is an analogy for choosing a spouse, and the young man represents a person who wants advice on how to go about it. If you re-read it and put in the choosing and marriage imagery (a test-drive for instance is dating), it will make a lot more sense (I hope)
(A hand at the far edge of the room shoots up, it's a young man who has been quiet all along)
Young man: Mr. Chairman sir, may I...
Chair: Please tell us your name, where you come from and why it is you have called for this meeting.
Young man: Thank you sir. My name is Ezekiel, and I am a resident of this town. I would like to express my interest in buying a car from your dealership.
Chair: (leaning back in his chair) Ok, go on...
Ezekiel: I have seen a certain model of a car being driven in town and I'm considering buying it from your dealership. However, I am not certain it is the right car for me...
Chair: Why not?
Ezekiel: Well, for one, I do not know how it drives. I have spoken to three different drivers, and they give contradicting information. Further, I don't know what happens if I buy it and do not like it, can I return it?
Chair: Whoa! One point at a time. (A hand shoots up at the other end of the table) Ok, Grace, would you like to take the first question? (The one named Grace nods) Ok, please respond...
Grace: Thank you chair. (Facing Ezekiel) My name is Grace, and I specialize in helping people find the right car. This car model, can you point out from posters on the wall? (Ezekiel points to the poster of a silver car on the opposite wall) Good choice Ezekiel! But is it good for you? To know this, you need to book a test drive round our track which helps you get comfortable with having the car, exploring the features and seeing how it drives. A car may look good from the outside, but once you drive it, it might not be a good choice for you. We always recommend a test drive...
Ezekiel: Can I drive it on a normal road under normal circumstances? In all honesty, a test track is never good enough for real-world scenarios.
Grace: Excellent question! Yes you can; however, that arrangement has some more stringent rules, and you need to sign a lot of papers, and pay some money first. Suffice it to say, we do not want a freeloader.(sits down as Ezekiel nods his understanding)
Chair: Thank you Grace. Who will tackle the next question? Yes Martin...
Martin: Thank you Chair. (turning to Ezekiel) Our return policy is elaborate; we discourage returns because it looks bad on our books and shows that there was no proper advice during the buying process, or it was not heeded. Further, the returned car usually has some dents, and it requires us to do some work to get it in the right shape for resale. Even then, its face value may have dropped, and other people are less likely to notice it and ask for it. In short, we highly discourage returns. We would rather you spend a lot of time test-driving the cars and finding the right match, than rush and have to return one. It's painful to you, to us and the car.
Ezekiel: What if I have two cars I cannot choose between?
Chair: Then choose either (a roar of laughter erupts from the table) Seriously though, I have found that deep down, there's the car we really want even though the test drive results show that it is far too tiny for us, or its engine is far too big for our liking. Sometimes people have bought cars with the hope of modifying them, but that's a great folly. Two years later, they will have wasted money, time and energy, and the result will be ugly, and something they cannot even drive. And then there's the car that's perfect for us, if we would overlook the mundane details, such as its color, or the sunroof and so on. Learn to look out for the core attributes and leave those simple characteristics out. Also, remember that you cannot drive two cars at the same time. Whichever you choose, give it the serious test driving it deserves and judge it on its own merits
Ezekiel: (nodding) I see. (turning to his adviser and whispering for a moment) What happens once I identify the car, and would like to purchase it.
Chair: Aaaaah! We make some money from you. (another laughter, this time more sustained and jovial; even Ezekiel is laughing) Our sales and legal team will meet with you to arrange the payment plan, sign papers and issue you the keys. Of course, you must have insurance, a valid driving licence and some experience handling cars.
Ezekiel: Why so elaborate?
Chair: It helps us weed out the suckers and the not-so-serious buyers. A car is an important buy; done right, you only need do it once; done wrong, it will wreck your life; we prefer the former. Any other concerns, questions or observations?
Ezekiel: None that come to mind, for now. Well, how soon can I start my test drive?
Chair: As soon as you can convince yourself of the car you want to test drive. Remember to take this seriously; talk to other people, think about it, pray about it. And then let's have some fun!
(Turning to the group)
There being no other matters, I'd like to adjourn this meeting.
(Everyone rises and leaves talking excitedly about this prospect customer; he will pas to legend as one who had no clue about how to buy a car)
PS: the car-selling round-table is an analogy for choosing a spouse, and the young man represents a person who wants advice on how to go about it. If you re-read it and put in the choosing and marriage imagery (a test-drive for instance is dating), it will make a lot more sense (I hope)
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